Full Blue Moon Dementia

I know my phone is ringing. I can’t see it. But I can hear it. For the last ten miles I’ve been hearing it ring – a non-stop, ring, ring, ringing. With one hand on the wheel I grope around with the other and dig the phone out of my bag. It isn’t ringing, and...

Dude was screaming. At least I thought he was. I could see his mouth wide open and he was shaking, the cords on his neck taught with exertion. The rumble from the industrial air-conditioning units was drowning out the noise, but it was obvious he was screaming. Slowly he raised his hand towards me, like...

“You’re movin?” asked the girl sitting on the stool next to me. “Goin to LA,” I said and then watched her recoil like I had spit in her face. “LA! Why the fuck you want to live there?” She was tall and sexy with long black hair and jet coal eyes, I’d been trying to...

“Hi, welcome to Taco Bell. Hope you’re having a nice day.” said the girl standing behind the counter. Her monotone voice so void of emotion it could have easily been computerized. “Define nice,” I answered, and looked around at all the brightly colored plastic and brushed aluminum and wondered why this was what fast food...

After a late dinner with a friend, I say goodbye, give her a kiss, and head home. As I walk up the hill I see two kids sitting on my building’s front steps, staring at me with goofy expressions, like they’re wondering why I’m walking towards them. But then the girl’s smile fades and she...

I have this big head. I was born with it. I see it in every damn mirror, darkened store window, even in the dull reflection of a car’s windshield. When I’m standing in line at a convenience store, I helplessly stare at the surveillance monitor hovering behind the counter and see myself squished up black...

In San Francisco on Telegraph Hill the rich folk all use the “absentee” ballot – opting out for the actual hands on voting. So my polling place, a garage at the dead end of Montgomery Street with the million dollar view of downtown, the Bay Bridge and the hills of Oakland, which is usually deserted,...

Saturday sucked. I woke up late. I woke up anxious. I looked at the clock and cursed. Most mornings I can’t sleep in and now when I was supposed to be somewhere, I had. All the enjoyment I could’ve reaped from the subversive complacency of staying under the covers, ignoring the world, was lost to...

The movie was French, promising subtitles and skinny women with petit breasts and complex dispositions. The theater was one of those art house independents that cater to the more affluent San Franciscans. The type that want an espresso with biscotti instead of a forty-ounce soda and tortilla chips covered with a slimy orange substance commonly...

There I am in line waiting for Batman and Stephan’s all, “did ya get the pictures Lynne sent to everybody in the entire freakin universe askin if they think she looks good?” “Ah, no I didn’t,” I said and immediately checked my cell phone’s email. “Hmmmm, she must hate you,” he said and smirked his...